Saturday, March 14, 2015

An Edgar Allen Poe dream

 

 
I read the Telltale Heart before going to bed
and early this morning I awoke suddenly
knowing and remembering what I had been dreaming
 
I was entering a mansion through a heavy mahogany door
and it swiftly became a revolving door
and I was spinning around in  mahogany walls that kept closing in on me
and it all stopped
 and a piece of wall cracked open
with a little shaft of light piercing through  and there it was
the eye....
.shriek!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
I'll never read him before bed again
 
-----------------------
 
Our writing group ( we are now down to 3) :(
has begun
What a great time it is meeting with these women once a week
One of them is stuck in her writing, trying too hard to control her characters 
they won't to go one way and she is determined to make them go according to her plot
oh well....do what you must....but I think the characters know better
The other woman is onto a great story about an escaped slave
...and me....I presented them my story for the week and they all cried
It was an emotional piece
and it did unburden me from something from the LISTS
 
The little girl character has appeared in many of my stories
..in fact they did recognize her.....Is this the girl you wrote about in another story
...Three other stories.....I said
There is a lot of energy to this girl from my childhood
a tragic event that happened
But not until I began my Bradbury way
did I write almost the truth...what I mean is
the truth of my shame
the story is fiction, but the shame was released in the writing
 
I didn't realize the burden of this character, so I put her in stories in different ways....
...I wrote around it
Bits of her story appearing in my stories
yes, she had an alcoholic father
yes, she had a mean grandmother
yes, there was a fire
 
I used all that in stories
 
but the engine of my writing about her was hidden to me
and I never wrote the true story
until I heard Mr. Bradbury's lecture
--------
Almost everything I write is in first person
and I am always having to say that it is a fictional story...sort of like trying to defend myself
that's how it feels.....I have worked hard and used skills to write that story and somehow I thought and still do think
they were dismissed by some  because they think I am only writing about something from life
and not using imagination to write it
but they are wrong....my stories gather things from me, but they are fictional
it didn't happen to ME...it is a story
 Surely something of me is in there, but it is made up
 
But this time it was pretty darn close to the actual event
things changed to make it a better story...because that is what my goal was...story
 
but the haunting hidden thing I unveiled was shame
a shame a little girl.....me.....
had wrongly incorporated into her very being and hidden until it was no more
but oh lordie....it was there
and this little 550 word short revealed it to me
 
no wonder they cried
but it is still a story
 
 
 
 

4 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing Suz, writing can be such a great release on many fronts!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You should never think that you have to defend your writing. Your words, poems, and stories do that already. They always have!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think that all of us writers draw on our past -- good or bad -- in our writing. It can be cathartic indeed.

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  4. Oooo... I love Poe. He gives me the shivers.

    ReplyDelete

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