I'm going to a barbeque next week

 

and I want to show up looking good

how I wish I could still wear those heels

alas, I can't

Stinks....but I have had to make many adjustments lately

regarding getting older

Last night I tripped over the cat's toy mouse

in the dark...heading to the bathroom at 4am

Stinks....

good thing I have a four poster bed... that foot board post saved me

But...the four cats flying around the room like bats out of hell

with a stick of dynamite up their butt

was worth it

Yes, I have kept the feral kittens from a year and a half ago

nuts...I know

but the shelter wouldn't take them because they're feral

and ...well...you know....I got attached

I have a saint for a husband

...he ignores them, but lets them stay

..a good man I married

 

There's an armed robber on the lose about 2 miles from here

near the store I was going to go to for a new pair of jeans

but decided to stay home because it's pouring outside

Don't you just hate an armed robber on the loose?

Five women were gunned down in that same mall about 5-6 years ago

....again I was going to go, but was too lazy to stop and get gas...so I stayed home

 

How many times have we had brushes with death or disaster and didn't know it?

scary...

 

I prayed last night

back in the saddle again

oh, that's not a picture of me.....
but a girl can dream

 ..................never did wear camouflage...darn....too late 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Dill

 

I bought dill at the farmers market last week

 

I put it in a pitcher around the fireplace

 

and let it dry

 

It works its magic on me as I am in the business of ordinary things

 

a simple olfactory  delight

catching me unaware and suddenly

taking me back to grandpa's back yard

one of my saving graces of childhood

 

Today, it brought comfort unexpectedly

so many things on my mind that I have no power over

except for my reaction to them

 

and the dill stepped up

did its job

 

brought me to a place of safety

and a simpler time

where I just excepted its fragrance around me

connected to a bent over gray haired man

who spoke little

I loved him so

 

and the dill brought him to me in a magic way

I am at the point where I think I will stop praying

no one is listening

and my heart gets broken over and over again

 

but the dill

told me differently

 

remember the love always

and have faith

 

 

 

 



The changing of the seasons
a welcome quickening of my heart
swelling buds
robin chirps
aconites poking through
the smell of wet earth

joy

soon the trees will awaken
and birds will be spotted with grasses and mud in their beaks
renewal
and we have nothing to do with it

except to get out our garden tools,
books, and magazines
Plan
and dream

Hank the Tank

Pot roast today...comfort food

It was a rough day yesterday.
My wonderful, funny clown of a cat, Hank the Tank
had a blocked bladder.
I have been to the emergency vet twice this month
the only time I can get this guy is after- hours it seems

TRYING TO CATCH A HARDWIRED, now house kept, FERAL kitty is
not easy
But I knew he was going south quickly.
I managed to chase him into a bedroom
 but our other male cat stuck his two cents in
and Hank froze in place long enough for me to shut the door
with Boo, the other male, safely locked out.
But I couldn't get him.
SO
I called my 86 year old mother.
She came over and she laid on the floor looking under the bed on one side, as I looked at him from the other side.
It took a bit of talking to him and squeezing my arm under the bed
trying to get him by the scruff.
WHAM... one shot and I got him and managed to get my arm  underneath him
to support his weight and I yelled out to my mom to open the door!
I had the carrier waiting just outside the door

She's an 86 year old lying on the floor! But I was so afraid that Hank would wiggle free
and then I would never be able to get him.
And sure enough my mom managed to get up and open the door. What a miracle lady she is at her age.

We got Hank to the doctor just in time...his bladder was about to breach

It's a good thing we've saved our money and that my husband makes a good living
he is getting the best of medical care

I took my mom out for a wonderful lunch

she earned it

I guess there will be stink in the car ride



 

time for a little poem

 

 

Skunk

Sometimes, around

Moonrise, a wraith

drifts in through

the open window:

a vague cold taint

of rank weeds

and phosphorescent

mold, a hint

of obscure dank

root hollows and

mist-woven paths,

Pale toadstools and

dark-reveling worms

by, half vapor,half

shade, diffusing

The night's uncanny

essence and atmosphere

 

by Valerie worth

 

Yep, there was a skunk outside last night

 

goodness....they let their presence be known when they are challenged
I hope it wasn't one of my feral cats....
maybe just a passing possum wanting a scrap or two left between deck boards

While I was attempting to fall asleep, the wonderful world of the night creatures
was going on outside...poor animals in the winter
but who wants skunk perfume

I got an email yesterday from the feral cat group asking if anyone had room
to house trapped cats overnight to be taken to the vet in the morning
oh...I was tempted...but I want to stay married
and there are limits

Maybe I should open a shelter
I have thought about it

but my kitties here already tie me down
I have to hire a caretaker for them when I go to Galena
good thing we saved our money and my husband is a saint

Glad there is a group that traps, neuters and releases these cats
and that there are humans willing to watch over them
and thank the county for protecting these colonies of needy felines
The goal is stop all the breeding...to have stable communities

Funny...since I have become a caretaker....the word must have gone out
so far this past 6 months....three extra kitties have graced the food bowls

Tommy Feral.....a beautiful gray tabby...I think he belonged to someone...he's gone now

Ragged Ritchie....old fluffy orange and white one who has shown up for years during the cold weather for a handout...very feral....he's hasn't been seen for months
and now...
Brutus, a large white and brown striped male...unneutered, I'm certain

My Henry runs from him, hiding under the deck until he (Brutus) has eaten every bit of  food in the bowls and drank from their heated water bowl
Funny...I haven't seen him in two days..now that I think about it

poor cats...so much danger out there for them
People love dogs....will risk everything to rescue them
but cats.....they are maligned ....but there are a few of use who love all animals
and help whenever we can

I may give my character, grandma, a cat (thanks Vicki for the suggestion)
and I will also make her a good cook....
this could work to fill in the time the girl and mother sit in the car together
...3 hours... one of the critiques I received at workshop
to take advantage of the car ride.....to reveal things
What did they talk about in the car? they asked
meddlers
but I guess they are right....humph  more work

Now to begin
writing....see ya

she cooks

 

 

When all else fails , make soup

That's always been my motto

But ,I made meatball soup a day ago and finished it up today for lunch

while I was making chicken soup

...it's cold outside

 

Truthfully, I was hoping the aroma would awaken

something good in my grandma character

the grandma of my story

the one who slaps a 10 year old off of a chair

...that grandma

 

I don't think she ....oh.....yes, she just might be a good cook

why didn't I think of that before?

 

Oh good something to work on tomorrow

I can do that....

 

The family is coming home today from Disney World

I am anxious to hear about the trip

 

 I hope she captured a bit of fantasy as reality

that's the miracle of being a 2 yr old girl or boy

 

Don't we wish they had a theme park for other things

 

like being with our passed loved ones

or beloved dogs or cats or birds or turtles?

..put a quarter in the slot and get the answer to any question?

get on a stage and say what we failed to say when they were alive?

Oh it could be fun

 

I better get back to the real world real soon

step away from the anthologies

loveable grandma

I made meatball soup yesterday. It was good.

 

Today I ate two bowls for lunch while staring out my kitchen window.

 

I have so much energy I am paralyzed...and do nothing

 

but enjoy the snow falling outside

 

watching the outdoor cats snuggle in their igloo

 

watch the birds eat their cat food while they snooze

 

ahh.....what happens when you are asleep

 

Two of my grandchildren are at Disney World now

 

having fun......much needed after so much health concerns for little Tuula

 

Hopefully some suggestions and guidance from Boston Hosp will help

 

Not fair that little ones get sick...

 

But she is a trooper and my daughter is her warrior

 

 

I have spent too much time inside lately

 

A person needs to feel the elements....smell them, taste them

 

stand in the wind and let it touch you

 

stand in the sunlight...feel its warmth, despite the bitter cold in the air

 

 

I feed birds and cats outside

 

ha....a few squirrels, possum, skunk and rabbits too

 

A big raccoon was drinking water from the heated water bowl last night

 

aww...go ahead I said as I shut off the porch light

 

...you are the least of these in my book...but hurry and don't let the neighbors see you

 

 

I have been reading many anthologies of short stories

 

...according to the Ray Bradbury plan

 

I dropped the essay reading.....I knew it wouldn't last.

 

Insight....from all this reading...

 

most of it.... unfulfilling....boring...what can I say

 

sure...if I reread it after looking online for "explanations" I might get a bit more out of these stories

 

But I'm sorry....you never grabbed me enough the first time to reread you

 

When you read one of my stories...I take you for a ride...

 

I have learned to layer things....'case you want to go back and look for more. Hints that you missed

 

the first time....maybe motivations you didn't see before...that only add richness to your experience

 

with my characters...

 

  Just another kitchen writer....me

you wouldn't think I am working on writing while eating and staring
but, yeah, I am
This past fall at a writing workshop...I was made aware that I need to make grandma

more loveable....at least capable of loving in some small way

..that's what I'm working on.....

but she isn't loveable.....but I get it

...showing a speck of humanity makes her all the more frightening in her cruelty



So.....I'm enjoying bowls of soup staring out of the window

 on this cold snowy afternoon

letting my mind sort it all out

for tomorrow.....I sit and write

maybe I can have her tend geraniums..........................................