Magpie tale #50

http://magpietales.blogspot.com/

I could not see beyond the bend,but the path before me was wide and bright, so I tarried on.

This trek through unfamiliar woods was not the way I had planned my day. It is my own fault,though, for not paying attention to where I was going. What started out as a brisk walk in the country to think things out, has now turned into a journey without a way. I thought I could and would remember the turns, but as I tried my way back I only became more confused. Was it this way or that? 

It is snowing now and the sky has become increasingly dark and the path is narrowing as it goes further into dense woods. I do not remember this denseness, but in the light of late afternoon it may have seemed less frightening. My feet are starting to get cold and my hands, though shoved into my pockets,are tingling that tingle before they start to get painful. It must be somewhere around 4pm; soon John will be wondering where I am, his dinner not made as he walks in the door. And to think this was the night I was going to tell him that I was leaving him, that I no longer could take his dark moods,his silent hostility,his meanness. I kept thinking if I just hang in there a bit more, it would change and he would change.

Now there is no path of any kind and I don't know which way I should go and I am tired and half frozen. Like in my life, I begin to think...half frozen..the life I am living has been like that, fear keeping me in place. I see the silhouette of an owl fly over, that silent messenger of the woods, and wonder what prey he has spotted. 

Why of all days do I have to get lost. Too cold and tired to go on, I sit on the ground next to a giant oak and lean against its bark looking up to the sky that is starless. In the darkness my eyes are getting heavy and I hear drumming and chanting, and the smell of smoke fills my nostrils and my eyes close to this world.

I enter a place of the ancients, and I am safe.

***