Friday, November 19, 2010

while at the bank today

I was in the drive-thru at the bank when I looked up and saw a woman in a wheelchair in the next parking lot struggling in her chair. I wasn't sure if her helper dog....a lovely large golden retriever..I wondered if his leashed had gotten caught because she was leaning forward and trying to do something. I watched as she leaned so far over that I feared she might just come right out of her chair. And then she began to spin around in her chair and the dog did nothing. My first reaction was a long forgotten memory....but I rose above this memory and shut off my car...told the teller I had to help someone...then went over to this poor soul struggling with something. When she saw me coming she smiled and then I saw that she had dropped her hat and it was now stuck under the wheels of the chair. The golden was the biggest one I have ever seen and a strap was around his muzzle.....maybe she did that to protect me?...anyway...I said, I can help and I reached down and freed her hat, and she thanked me.  I asked her if she was okay...sure she said, thanks.
I returned to my car and to the memory.
About 25 years ago I saw another wheelchair bound person struggling...a man. He was trying to cross a major street in the middle of the block...and he was not doing very well in this non motorized chair. I had my little daughter Sarah with me and she was horrified that he might get hit. So I pulled over,got out and went into the street to help this man. Well he began swearing at me and shouting he didn't want or need any help from the likes of me. I was shocked. What could I do? I left him alone and returned to the car. But his attack towards me lasted quite a long time for me and my daughter.
So today when I saw this woman struggling, the memory of that incident came rushing right back to me.
Should I or shouldn't I try to help?  Of course I should....so what if she lashes out at me like that man did?  As it turned out,she was grateful that I helped her.
....Bad memory gone.
Turns out ..she probably helped me more.

21 comments:

  1. i know what you mean. you never know...but you did the right thing...

    have a wonderful novemeber weekend, my friend

    kary
    xxx

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  2. Oh wow, that's a really beautiful conclusion!

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  3. Thanks Kary, I will ...getting ready for Thanksgiving...making lists,shopping,baking,getting out the good dishes...
    M.Heart...Really and truly we never know what we do for others unaware

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  4. Good story -- some folks are touchy about being helped -- but you did the right thing.

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  5. Just a perfect last line to your story. And profound. Sometimes being filled with humility is such a gift.

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  6. Suz,
    You are so right: it's always better to offer and be rebuked than to watch someone in need and do nothing!
    Good on ya.
    rel

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  7. On our honeymoon nearly 20 years ago Dr. M & I had the same experience as you. We were eating at a little dive restaurant that was really mostly a bar & a guy in a wheelchair who was QUITE intoxicated couldn't make it over the door jamb when he was leaving. His friends, equally intoxicated, couldn't seem to help him. When Dr. M offered to help we got a tongue lashing we still remember. I'm glad you have the new experience to wash that bad taste out of your mouth!

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  8. wow bug that is exactly how it was...
    and yes I will give thanks for this woman who took that all away by.. giving by receiving

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  9. You never know how people will react but I think it's always the right thing to offer.
    No act of kindness goes unnoticed even if the person you are trying to help didn't want it.

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  10. Well done Suz, we should always help when we feel we can.

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  11. people are different,
    Glad that you helped the second time.
    inspirational post.
    Happy Sunday!

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  12. I think you did hte right thing :)

    Better to help and be turned down, then not help when someone could really use it!

    You have a good heart

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  13. Yes, for sure, you never know. But you are so good to try to help and that's all you can do and feel good about it, no matter what. Of course you would, that's "you". The man must have been a very bitter person. Feel sorry for him. This lady, and of course her golden, were meant to happen in your path.

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  14. doing the right thing sometimes takes a lot of courage. Bravo!

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  15. I'm glad you didn't let that one bad memory stop you from helping the lady with the hat. You did the right thing both times.

    One day I was walking down the street, lost in thought as I tried to decide what I should do with my life. I was at a crossroads and wanted to change careers to something that involved helping people. I was so absorbed in my thoughts I didn't see a man in a wheelchair stuck in the middle of the street until he yelled out to me, "How about some help here?" It was a rather profound lesson. I was so busy trying to figure out my future I didn't even notice someone right in front of me that needed help.

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  16. What a wonderful story Suz. It reinforces the adage that 'what other people do should not be an excuse to not do what we know is right'. And what wisdom you found in that experience! "Turns out ..she probably helped me more." Amen!

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  17. That's funny, I helped a woman in a chair at the grocery store today.
    I grew up with loved ones that used chairs, and I would imagine they would have been grateful for your help. My Mom used a chair during the last few years of her life also, and her grandcholdren were always happy to help her in any way they could.
    It would seem that the gentleman, using the term loosly, had not come to terms with his situation:(

    As I count my blessing this week I count you among them, have a lovely holiday:)

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  18. poor broken-bitter man.

    glad you took the risk. :)

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