Willow, at http://magpietales.blogspot.com/ hosts a weekly writing prompt
using the below photo. Write a poem or vignettte
I got his pocket watch... still in the original velvet box with the satin lining.
Never used, saved for a special occassion, and I guess in all his 60 years on this earth there never was one because, I never saw him with it. But then again, I never saw much of him.. He traveled around the world making deals...making money...he said, for me...so I wouldn't have to work as hard as he. I would have rather had a father. But I got the watch...still in the pristine packaging.
Before they closed the casket I bowed my head in respect and dropped the ornately engraved,Roman numeraled, silver, pocket watch into his coffin.
All I wanted was you ,dad, I whispered over him.
I turned and walked back to the pew somber that I had given him back the watch for this special occassion.
It was the least I could do for him.
how sad --perhaps working so hard was his way of showing his love? Doesn't replace the loss felt though. Well done. Great Magpie!
ReplyDeleteI echo...Well done...well thought out. Aimed for the heart and got there in few words.
ReplyDeleteThis one certainly struck home with me. Touching piece, Suz.
ReplyDeleteSo sad yet it reminded me of what a wonderful dad I had. He ALWAYS had time for me. :-)
ReplyDeleteOooh I want that watch. Great story.
ReplyDeleteExcellent story, lesson and all.
ReplyDeleteOh, tears are running down my cheeks. Beautiful.
ReplyDeleteWhat powerful words Suz,
ReplyDeletea reminder for us all to what is truly in important in life.
Joanny
Oh, that brought tears to my eyes. Beautiful, Suz.
ReplyDeleteWow, Suz.... This one was kind of a "stunner". Several ways it could be read, and all are jolting! Great write! And the thought of time in "pristine packaging".... Really good, Suz!
ReplyDeleteRick
Wow. This is a great magpie! I especially like the part where your protagonist narrates, "I turned and walked back to the pew somber that I had given him back the watch for this special occassion." I loved that line.
ReplyDeleteThis was so sad and really brings home what it really important in life.
ReplyDeleteChristine
oh heck...great tension in this one...i dont ever want to be like that again...
ReplyDeleteYou say a lot in two paragraphs -- well done!
ReplyDeleteWhat you wrote...perfect.
ReplyDeleteMany people can identify with your story. So sad isn't it?
ReplyDeleteA good, concise story - and a potent rumination on "time."
ReplyDeleteSuz,
ReplyDeleteI hear ya Suz.
rel