Thursday, July 15, 2010

Magpie Tale

MAGPIE TALE # 23

host a weekly writing prompt
from the below photo write a poem or vignette


It now holds the door open like a good man,
the beautiful old cylinder of copper
that once held an important position 
-first defense against Hilda's cooking.
She always burnt something down there in the church's  kitchen.
But, because she was really a wonderful cook,just a bit absentminded,and no one else would take the job of church cook,
the pastor made sure that there were 3 extinguishers on hand,
and that the fire department was always made aware when the church was having its
big toodooings.
Sometimes the chief would come by to check on Hilda and she'd be very upset
that everyone thought she would actually burn down the church
but, we all knew the chief actually came by to get some of her struedel and rattle her chains a bit.
Well, it turned out that one time they really did use the old copper extinguisher
but, it was when the pastor's cigarette slipped out of the ashtray and started the carpet on fire,
and he began yelling FIRE FIRE and Hilda grabbed the canister and tried hauling it to the church offfice
but, when she got there the Chief had already arrived with 2 firetrucks and an ambulance.
Never again did Hilda have to suffer ridicule for a few potholders that had caught the flames of the stove
or a few trays of cookies that were left in the oven too long or that one pork roast that flared up in the oven sending smoke up into the sanctuary...
no, now it was pastor's extinguisher to carry around his neck.


***



37 comments:

  1. I enjoyed this post about the cook who burnt - and thanks for visiting me blog.

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  2. glad you actually found me!

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  3. Oh those absent-minded pastors will do the darnedest things. Nice Magpie.

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  4. This was especially funny to me, since I used to be the church cook! (Dr. Willow fixed your linky) :)

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  5. oh hahahah - nice to see she wasn;t the guilty party-but just a silly smoker with his stinky cigarette! Ewwww.

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  6. Lovely story, been there with the burning pots.
    It doesnt matter when your heart is in the right place.

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  7. Your story is a lovely little diversion. This is not meant to sound trite or condescending - it is meant as a high complement.

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  8. For some starnge reason I thought of the TV series - The Vicar of Dibley - tales behind the sacred church doors! A wonderful piece of writing!

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  9. What a great story, a really good read.

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  10. Oh, this is just a delight. It reminds me a bit of A Prairie Home Companion, and that's definitely a good thing.

    I want to thank you for commenting on my One Stop post on Wednesday. Before I die, I fully intend to get around to everyone's blog. That, and turn my third bedroom into a reading room. I am not sure which I am likely to finish first.

    Again, this was a pure delight.I just loved it.

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  11. LOL~~~you started my morning with a chuckle. I love the way you write. Somehow, I think you knew Hilda and the pastor.
    BlessYourHeart and
    HaveAGreatWeekend

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  12. Dar I have known many of them

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  13. Thank you Suz, I enjoyed the story, and I'm sure it's true!

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  14. Dear Suz...

    Alas I think I am the only one who went over to darkness with this magpie...

    Loved your story that just jumped off the screen to make me smile...

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  15. Your down to earth voice and subject just bring on the smile...great job!

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  16. I, too, was reminded of Prairie Home Companion! And that's high praise!

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  17. I just loved this ! I loved the flow of it and the ideas! I am so happy to find your blog, and thank you for finding mine! I will be reading more of your words..I will be going back
    in time too!

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  18. Great story, agreed - I think Garrison Keillor would like this one...bravo magpie..bkm

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  19. enjoyed your post

    sending you best wishes for a lovely july weekend

    kary and teddy
    xxx

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  20. wow, this was a killer magpie, suz! the more flak she got, the more i rooted for ol' hilda so your ending made me smile from ear to ear! what a great story!

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  21. Loved this and I was with Hilda!!

    Christine

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  22. Seems Hilda was doing a slow burn all those years! Good one, Suz!

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  23. Served that pastor right! Haha. Loved this!

    www.angiemuresan.com

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  24. I really like this a lot, you did a great job with the writing...and it is a great story too! Def. a magpie worth reading!

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  25. I liked this a lot. It has an eafrthy feeling to it, so much so, that I could smell the burned cookies... :D

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  26. Dear Suz: Very funny bit about "Hilda", the flambe cook not by choice but by chance! Wonderful fun! Excellent poem on prompt! Extinguisher on the "ready"!

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  27. Love it! I've been known to catch a toaster on fire myself :)

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  28. Served him straight - what a laugh it is!

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  29. Fantastic last line! Just wonderful!

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  30. ha. i think i would call that poetic justice...the last line gave me a smile.

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  31. Good story Suz. Just shows that accidents can happen to anyone, any time. At least she's off the hook now.

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  32. An enjoyable read, Suz. Thank you!

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  33. what fun take.
    your humor and wit truly shine
    here.

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  34. Hilda burns food and sets potholders alight, the pastor smokes. Tell me which church so I can avoid it! Ha.. I agree, very Garrison Keillor. Do you write his scripts?

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  35. Suz,
    I do enjoy sitting on your back porch and listening to you tell your stories!
    rel

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  36. Thanks Stafford...church ladies are indeed funny fodder for scripts
    Rel..I enjoy yours also...
    Thanks jingle..you are the sweetest
    Soundoffreedom...I got a chuckle out of Hilda myself
    Su J ..so glad you enjoyed Hilda
    Ah Linda..yes she is...and it couldn't happen to a nicer man
    Linda..accidents do happen..but no one wants to be the butt of ajoke
    Steviewren..glad you liked my last line..I tried to go visual
    Brian..I like a good story too
    Tumblewords..he did deserve it didn't he
    Bug...maybe there will be an opening at that church for cook

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